Entries from Earth's Diary
Dear Diary,
Today Phoebus Apollo, the sun god, has allowed his son, Phaethon, to drive his chariot. I overheard Phoebus Apollo tell his son that he might have one favor as proof that he truly is his father. The foolish boy insisted on driving the chariot. I can’t believe it. I heard his father warn him over and over how dangerous it is. The horses are difficult to control. Phoebus Apollo is clearly concerned. Phaethon is an idiot, but Phoebus Apollo can’t seem to say no to him. Why can’t he listen to his father? I’m afraid of what this will bring.
Today Phoebus Apollo, the sun god, has allowed his son, Phaethon, to drive his chariot. I overheard Phoebus Apollo tell his son that he might have one favor as proof that he truly is his father. The foolish boy insisted on driving the chariot. I can’t believe it. I heard his father warn him over and over how dangerous it is. The horses are difficult to control. Phoebus Apollo is clearly concerned. Phaethon is an idiot, but Phoebus Apollo can’t seem to say no to him. Why can’t he listen to his father? I’m afraid of what this will bring.
Earth
Dear Diary,
It is as I had feared. Phaethon is losing control. The horses are off course. They are running wild. Why, oh why, did Phoebus Apollo allow his son to take the reins? It was such a foolish move. I can see that chaos is about to come if he doesn’t regain control soon.
It is as I had feared. Phaethon is losing control. The horses are off course. They are running wild. Why, oh why, did Phoebus Apollo allow his son to take the reins? It was such a foolish move. I can see that chaos is about to come if he doesn’t regain control soon.
Earth
Dear Diary,
HELP! I AM ON FIRE! My mountains are burning! I can feel the heat from the flames as they scorch the tops. It hurts so badly! Make it stop! How do I stop the flames? They are spreading too quickly. The heat is so intense that there is no moisture left to rain. It’s so hot, too hot.
Earth
Dear Diary,
I am the victim of a foolish child’s stubbornness. Someone needs to stop Phaethon. He is ruining everything. My beautiful land, it is burning. The pain is becoming unbearable. I don’t know if I can take this heat for much longer. Please make it stop.
Earth
Dear Diary,
I didn’t think it could get any worse, but it has. My lovely trees have lost all their green leaves. Nothing is left. All has been turned to ash. My beautiful meadows with flowers of red and violet are all gone. The cities where all my people live are being consumed by the flames. Both animals and people alike are burning, dying. Whatever should I do? How do I make it stop? I am extremely sad and in great pain. I just want it to end.
Earth
Grief is consuming me. I am saddened at the loss of my plants and animals. I tried so hard to keep them safe, but there is nothing I can do. The flames are out of control.
Earth
What did I do to deserve this punishment? The pain is more than I can bear. My rivers and lakes are drying up. My trees and flowers have been turned to ash. I thought I was doing well with my service to the gods. Why do the gods allow this punishment to continue?
Earth
Dear Diary,
Oh Jupiter, king of the gods, if I have deserved this, why delay your lightning bolts? Is it right for me to die through the power of fire? If so, let me die by your fire and let the one who caused it lessen the pain! I have offered my fruitfulness and service for your gardens and grazing for your flocks. This is what I receive in return? I do not understand what I have done to receive such torture.
Earth
Dear Diary,
Now the waters have been diminished. My poles are steaming. Soon they will melt and if they do the God’s own palace will fall. Poor Atlas, he is suffering as well. The sky is too hot and difficult for him to hold up. Please, king of the gods, have mercy on me. Save what is left before all is lost.
Earth
Dear Diary,
My prayers have been answered! Jupiter himself has struck Phaethon from the sky with his powerful lightning bolt. Just when I thought all hope was lost. Sadly Phaethon is dead now. I do hope lessons have been learned and Phoebus Apollo will no longer allow anyone to take over the chariot reins. But now I can begin to heal. I thank you Jupiter for your mercy.
Earth
Once again I am happy. The torture of the flames is subsiding. I have endured the pain for so long. My forests and meadows are beginning to recover. The rains have returned and my life is no longer threatened. I feel so relieved.
Earth
Author's note: I took this story from Ovid's Metamorphoses, Phaethon's Ride. I liked the idea of expressing the anguish of the earth as she burned. I thought that the earth recording the events as diary entries would be an interesting spin on the story.
This is a new story to me, and I really enjoyed the angle you told it from! The idea to tell it from entries in Earth's diary was so unique and I think its a method that I could see myself using in future stories. You did a great job of expressing emotions and descriptive details in the short diary blurbs. I enjoyed learning about Phaethon's Ride in this way.
ReplyDeleteThis story was so interesting to me! I really liked that you took Earth and made it into a diary about all of the things happening on Earth and how it's feeling about different things happening on it. It was so interesting about Phaethon's ride and how it affected Earth. I haven't ever heard about Phaethon's ride so it's was awesome to read about it as diary entries. You gave Earth a personality, which can definitely be hard to do since it is a planet.
ReplyDeleteEven though this story was about one particular instance in mythology, what happened after the ride though? Was everything fine after that on earth or were there more things to expand on? Could there have also maybe been more planets to expand on?
The story is really good as is, but I was thinking that it might be interesting had you added more entries from before and after Phaethon's ride. Maybe added how Earth was doing/what it was thinking before the ride happened and maybe another entry after Jupiter helped it out and how Earth returned to normal.
Your story was great as a whole though! I really enjoyed reading it in diary format. It was really creative!
What a cool way to describe this story! I love the idea of writing a story from an inanimate object's point of view. Since it's something most people don't think about, it's a great way to put a new spin on the story!
ReplyDeleteThe paragraph where Earth is crying out to the gods, asking "Why? What have I done to deserve this? Why don't you just finish me now?" reminds me a lot of the psalms, where David is crying out to God to bring justice to his enemies that pursue him. Or Job, whose live is suddenly in turmoil and cries out in similar anguish. Did you think about either of those things when you were writing it?
Well done, I love the angle!
I really enjoyed how you used a diary as your form of telling the story. I really like the story too because it shows how man has destroyed the earth and the natural lands. The details really made me feel sad for earth and how earth felt so cheated and couldn’t understand why something so unfair was happening. I have heard once that fires can actually be good to forests? They overturn the soil and can make harvest better. It’s like having to go through a lot of pain before seeing a gain. I could be wrong about the fire being a good thing though.
ReplyDeleteI would kindly suggest explaining the original story a bit more in your bibliography. I have never read Ovid’s Metamorphoses so I was curious to read more about the original story and how you changed it. I would of also liked to see more of your thoughts about the main purpose.
I also really enjoyed the pictures that you included in your story! They really helped me imagine what kind of pain could be felt by earth.
What a good story! The way you chose to lay it out is both incredibly creative and also enjoyable for the reader! I like the images you used, and I think the diary aspect you used is great. It makes you feel for the Earth, and makes a story that might be hard to relate to otherwise very relatable. The progression of each entry to an ultimate resolution is both suspenseful and enjoyable for the reader. All of the images you used really helped support the story, and gave me visuals that encouraged creative thought as I read each successive diary entry. I can honestly say that I have enjoyed this story as much or more than any story that I have read so far. I would have never thought to write a story in this fashion, and I think it worked very well! So, all of that being said, very enjoyable read!
ReplyDelete